Saturday, May 15, 2010

3:50am

So...everyone is asleep and I'm mixed with random emotions right now. I have to admit that I feel a bit emo and quiet. I don't know what God's plan is for me anymore, not that I ever did but I always thought I had a little clue. :sigh: I'm starting to lose hope but I refuse to accept defeat. In a way, until I was 19 my life seemed simple and pretty much planned the way I saw fit. After 19...my world has gone upside down and in directions I never saw coming. But that's life, eh? What's my destiny? What am I meant for?

[how awesome is this!?]

As a whole though, I feel like parts of my "self" has evolved. My heart is full, something that is foreign to me. I've learned to address conflicts in a adult manner, though I have to confess that it's a struggle every time. I'm still adapting to live for the moment and stop planning SO much for the future because without enjoying the journey to your goal you're already not living. I'm smarter about relationships and not giving my heart so easily. Being strong.

Here's food for thought
"We want God to change our circumstances, but God wants to use our circumstances to change us."

totally.

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